10 01 2009

Work (n.) – exertion or effort directed to produce or accomplish something; one’s place of employment. See Also: Job

Job (n.) – a post of employment; full-time or part-time position; the process or requirements, details, etc., of working.

Hey, I’ve got an idea! Suck it! Fuck work, fuck jobs, fuck employment, I quit!

A classic sign of "I'm about to quit!"

A classic sign of "I'm about to quit!"

Work could better be defined as something that everybody “needs” to do but nobody “wants” to. That’s the obvious fact. A job would better be defined as a place you go where a bunch of other blow holes tell you how they are gonna ruin your day, make you miserable, cause you massive amounts of stress, and not compensate you in any way for any extra troubles!

When you start to do work outside of your job description, or you are working at home in your free time to complete a project uncompensated, then you are no longer working. You are taking it in the ass.  Some things that may be included in the “ass taking” category are being given other associates work loads because they fucked up somewhere and can’t handle it, or possibly being given a project that you know cannot be completed in the time given, but it was already promised to the customer. These are just some random situations where you might be taking one in the ass, or maybe they’re real? Either way, everyone takes it, because we have no choice.

A new method of dealing with work might be to place your boss under something heavy, and assist it in falling on him.

A new method of dealing with work might be to place your boss under something heavy, and assist it in falling on him.

Here is my theory on why work kills people, follow me here people….

A job leads to work, which is what everyone knows and expects. What they don’t expect is that extra work is going to cause added stress. Added stress leads to troubled marriages, especially if both spouses experience added stress. A troubled marriage might lead to a divorce if untreated, because lets face it people, you can’t stay married to save your lives and it makes me sick. Work it out, people disagree sometimes and make mistakes! Ok…back on track, sorry. Now, this divorce will lead to one spouse getting the shaft in court, because people are greedy little bitches. Then the one spouse who got the shaft, might dress like Santa, show up at a Christmas party and light the place up! Just a theory, work = death.

So I quit…. I’m running away to Australia, who’s coming with me?




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